When you meet orphans in their worlds and have the chance to get to know them and see what life is like for them in other countries you cannot forget it. You can no longer turn a blind eye. You can't help but crying tears of joy when another child comes home with their forever family. You can't help but want to see them all in families.
I will never forget Matteo from my time in Belize. He was so malnourished and broken in his flesh but oh how I loved spending my hours holding him and singing to him. He was so thin and his body was very crippled. He had just come to the home/orphanage as his family didn't have the resources to meet his needs. He has a piece of my heart. He taught me that God can make me strong and that we are to love and care for the children that others may reject or not feel comfortable around.
Then in Guatemala my sister brought us to the local hospital where children with disabilities live. Being able to hold and love on the children there was a beautiful experience.They loved being held. All the children just soak up the attention. A lot of the children have families who come to visit them but cannot meet their needs on a daily basis. I love seeing that people and missionaries continue to go and care for and engage with these children (and now adults for the older ones). We need to be the hands and feet of Christ.
I know that God has broken my heart for children with disabilities; especially if they are orphans. I can't get them out of my heart or mind.
Seeing first hand through Wyatt what a family does for children makes me want to advocate even more for children. It is not an easy road to walk but the reward of seeing the changes and life that a loving family brings is a miracle. It is redemption before your eyes. It is worth everything that the journey brings.
I feel that I have another child waiting for me in Bulgaria. I can't shake the feeling or sense. I knew that I would adopt again but I assumed it would years down the road.When I think of the thought of starting the process again and the raising of funds and all the paperwork and ups and downs of waiting; I'm tired thinking of it.... then God reminds me that He is faithful and provides. He reminds me of all the lessons and blessings of Wyatt's adoption. He reminds me that His timing is perfect. He reminds me of the life changed forever because of having a family. He reminds me that I am to live to please Him.
I am praying that God will make things clear and show me when the right timing is for me to start the process again. I cannot apply again until the beginning of February and I do not know if that is when I will start the process again. Please pray that I will know God's will in this and be obedient. That if there is another child in Bulgaria who is meant to be a Keno that God would make that clear.